A beloved child of mine picked up a toy for free at a garage sale a year or two ago. I thought nothing of it, as it was just a kid’s meal premium and it kept him happy. Little did I know how wrong I was, and how maniacally those people must have laughed in their car-cave after we left, howling with glee at the sublime victory of getting rid of the most annoying toy on the planet in such a sneaky manner. I blush to recall that I even prompted my son to THANK them for it
I do not think our beloved Captain was malfunctioning when we first brought it home, but he has now gone quite sick in the head. Constantly, I hear a voice, which seems to follow me from room to room along with the sound of the pitter patter of little feet. A voice which ever calls, “Kirk to Enterprise!” Of course, said toy is among the Top Ten list of favorite playthings of aforementioned child, therefore said toy can not be kidnapped by the secret Toynapping Ninjas of the Night who have mysteriously and oh-so-successfully carried off many an unfortunate Happy Meal casualty. It even seems impervious to Mommy Tsunami, which strikes at will and carries off garbage bags of kid debris on their messy room come-uppins days. But alas and alack, day and night I must endure the woe of overhearing poor Captain Kirk constantly calling out for his comrades in arms to come save him. Do not they always do so in the TV episodes? And isn’t everything portrayed on TV just absolutely true in every way??. No, sadly no, for no one has yet come to claim my annoying cohabitant… and I am beginning to wonder by what means this piece of plastic torture is operating. Certainly a normal battery would have died long before now, so are we looking at some kind of internal perpetual motor? Geo-electrical forces? Paranormal possession perhaps? Aliens?!
I am sorry, Captain Kirk, but no matter how many times you use your communicator, the Enterprise is not going to come back for you.
I am as much a Trekkie as the next cerebral conservative American woman, but there is one thing I can thank this annoying toy for, and perhaps that is the only redeeming quality which has saved it from the garbage bin. This alter-ego of William Shatner has opened my eyes to a few realities I had not seen as clearly nor believed as firmly as I do now.
1. Since today’s God seems to be the arm of flesh, and today’s utopian vision seems something very much akin to the United Federation of Planets, this constant calling out of the dear Captain with nobody responding ever or at all began to suddenly remind me of a Bible Story I’ve been told since I was a child: The powerful and impressive account of the prophet, Elijah, versus the priests of Ba’al. In recent months I have been taking some classes. Here, there, everywhere I hear the United Nations and the World Health Organization being quoted as the be-all and end-all experts on everything, and that Obamacare is going to save the world. I am getting sick and tired of hearing it, over and over and over. I have as much confidence that these powerful organizations and the people behind them will not seek to threaten the sovereignty of my country and my own personal liberty as I have confidence that I will see a miniature Starship Enterprise come flying into my living room, actually transmit a teleportation beam down into the abyss of the toy box, and at last, carry away my plastic Captain Kirk.
2. This constant calling out for the Enterprise to “come in”, for the cleverly-disguised-to-American-eyes United Nations to come and save him reminded me of the Christians of the Rapture persuasion, who go around with bumper stickers that talk about vehicles being unmanned. You know, the ones who believe that Jesus will take all the righteous people up to heaven with him and leave the rest of us poor sinners down here to become crispy critters when all of planet Earth is burned with fire. People of this persuasion used to freak me out when I was a child, along with the tambourine beaters and arm wavers… until I actually got out my scriptures, studied upon the topic, and realized that although their conclusion is a bit off the mark, there is some truth to the hope upon which they pin their faith. It surely is a truth that in the television series and in the live experience going on daily at my house, Captain Kirk most definitely has unconquerable faith in his rescue. His confidence is unswerving and unremitting that he will be rescued. There is a total reliance that he would never be left behind by the powers that be. I woke up to the fact that that is a total lie… but that there are real people just like this who really believe that someday all will be well and there will be world peace everywhere if everyone just shrinks on down to the homogenization and devaluation of individuality required for world government. Real people who are devoting their lives to it and running around everywhere they can, day and night, calling out this mantra, which, as much as they truly and devoutly believe in it, is still false. I also woke up to the fact that perhaps my faith is not as strong as the Captain’s, and beyond the fact that I am not a mindless gadget,I wondered why that was. I realized that by listening to false messages over and over and over again, I am perhaps being brainwashed out of my devotions to God by heeding the devotions of others who are not at all devoted to him. Just because a falsehood is repeated over and over again, doesn’t make it true, and just because I may be the only one who believes a truth doesn’t make it any less true. I’m sorry, you world-without-God-utopians… but outside of my faith in the real and efficable power of the true Rescuer, Transformer and Transporter of Souls, even the Lord Jesus Christ, I do not have such faith in any institution or power of man. I guess I didn’t realize that until enduring weeks without end of hearing a godless man call out for his godless rescue by godless powers. I didn’t realize before that this was what I was being taught. That the future would be alright and better without such “archaic” and “primitive” beliefs such as the necessity of a Redeemer and the reality of a true and living God. The only power I want to beam me anywhere is the one that knows me and loves me as an individual, and doesn’t encase me in a uniform with a life devoted to the state and essentially devoid of family. The truth of the matter is that if we cease to embrace God and the traditional moral values which have blessed the United States and made it what it is, we will cease to be God’s and cease to be the United States.
3. Lucifer ever has and ever will desert his supporters, even his most devout and dedicated, in their hour of direst need. He never was true and faithful and never will be. He is as unable to save now as he was in the days of Elijah and no matter what new name or guise we find him in, again and again and again, he will never change from being the liar that he is, the father of fear, the king of selfishness, and the utmost, front-of-the-line worshipper, protector and devotee of his own self at the expense of all other sentient beings.
So I am keeping this annoying little anti-prophet around. Perhaps I have just learned to put up with him. Perhaps it is just because I need the constant reminder that there are forces at work to undermine everything that I believe in, and I need to be as repetitive, diligent, constant and unrelenting in my calls for my God and his Righteousness and his Kingdom to be established as ever any captain of any other enterprise ever was. Because, you know what? Sooner or later the power behind the constant droning voice of the opposition will run it’s course and die out… and THEN and only then, will there be true peace.
“If you have not chosen the Kingdom of God first, it will, in the end, not matter what else you have chosen instead.” – Elder Neal A. Maxwell